my sadness is invisible to most.
I don't like to lay the burden on others.
but I spend most nights
laying around. Thinking of life before and after her.
and the inbetween.
and of my family. that I built.
my family of three reduced to one.
and of his furry little face
and her brown eyes.
their excitement at my arrival home
their complete love for me.
I didn't exist as a woman or man to them.
I just was.
I was their comfort
their strength
and they are mine.
'i am so heavy... heavy in your arms'-florence
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